Thursday, April 23, 2009

Pounce or Pause?

Bismillaah

As Salaamu 'alaykum and Peace to All,

Pounce or Pause?



One day, I witnessed a man being humiliated by another in public. My heart pounded so fast as I fear the retaliation and commotion that was sure to come.

To my amazement, the ‘victim’ just remained calm and stood there, being bashed left right center. Once it ended, he began talking in a calm and composed manner.

My eyes went teary immediately.

What a strong man, SubhanAllaah…I whispered to myself

He reminded me of Prophet’s (may peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) words,

‘The strong man is not the one who can wrestle (fight); the strong man is the one who controls himself at the time of anger’ (Saheeh Bukhari)

He had demonstrated to me something I have not seen in many years. I was humbled by the self-controlled shown when he could very well respond to his assaulter in a similar manner.



I was sure he was angry. I could see his face changed color from fair to red like a barbecued lobster!

But that was it.

Only his face turned red but his physical wasn’t moving at all- not his mouth, not his fist and not any of his limbs. He didn’t react negatively. He didn’t fulfill my expectations. He didn’t become angry. In fact, he waited until the assaulter was done then spoke calmly.

I walked away from the scene, head down, thinking if I could ever do the same. Could I control myself, be objective and then correct the mistake of my assaulter calmly? If I am being shouted at, accused or humiliated, do I have the strength to keep my cool and speak in a dignified way?

There is a Dutch proverb that we could learn from,

‘An ounce of patience is worth a pound of brains’


It is so true, don’t you think?

We all knew the gentleness of Prophet (pbuh) in handling human matters. For example, in the hadeeth below, Prophet (pbuh) has shown us how to remain calm when his companions around him were ready to pounce.

‘Anas b. Malik reported: While we were in the mosque with Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him), a desert Arab came and stood up and began to urinate in the mosque. The Companions of Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) said: Stop, stop, but the Messenger of Allah (may peace be upon him) said: Don't interrupt him; leave him alone. They left him alone, and when he finished urinating, Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) called him and said to him: These mosques are not the places meant for urine and filth, but are only for the remembrance of Allah, prayer and the recitation of the Qur'an, or Allah's Messenger said something like that. He (the narrator) said that he (the Holy Prophet) then gave orders to one of the people who brought a bucket of water and poured It over.’ (Muslim)

SubhanAllaah,
could we see how cool, calm and collected Prophet (pbuh) was?

The man was urinating in the house of Allaah! That was just a bit too much to take, right? The Muslims around him were ready to stop the man, but, Prophet (pbuh) stopped them instead.

Don’t interrupt him, leave him alone…

That was his very words, subhanAllaah…

But then, right after, Prophet (pbuh) called the man and explained to him on how to conduct himself in a proper manner when he is in the house of Allaah.

What was the wisdom behind not responding harshly towards this man?

One thing we all know about our natural ‘water disposable’ system is that if we could not hold it in, we could not hold it in, right? So, surely it was of no use to force this man to stop immediately.

Secondly, Prophet (pbuh) was also saving the man from more embarrassment, you agree?

Not only that, he (pbuh) also taught us to remain calm and not insult, get angry and even raise our voice to an offender.

Instead, we should inform him the correct way or give solution to the problem. Don’t just highlight his mistake.

Nikki Giovanni once said,

‘Mistakes are a fact of life. It is the response to the error that counts’


How do we respond to the mistakes others made around us? Are we always ready to pounce? Or are we going to pause a moment and think of the wisest way as exemplified by Prophet (pbuh)?

Think about it….

Sis Zabrina also known as Zabrina A. Bakar, is a Life Storyteller, motivational and inspirational writer and speaker; and author and creator of Islamic motivational book Life Open Secret book series http://wwww.LifeOpenSecret.com. She maintains an active blog at http://www.WisdomThruWords.blogspot.com. and social networking platform a Web 2.0 at http://www.LifeStoryteller.ning.com

Copyright © Sis Zabrina 2008

Sis Zabrina
Life Storyteller
Author of Life is an Open Secret Islamic Motivational Book Series:
Life is an Open Secret- Think about It
Life is an Open Secret- You, Me and We
Hidup Bukan Rahsia http://www.lifeopensecret.com

-18 Inspirational Stories from Ordinary life experiences-

Now blogging at http://www.wisdomthruwords.blogspot.com




~ Life Storyteller Blog: Your Source for Islamic Motivational and Inspirational Stories~

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Sis Zabrina, also known as Zabrina A. Bakar, is a Life Storyteller, motivational and inspirational writer and speaker; and author of Islamic motivational book series Life is an Open Secret http://www.lifeopensecret.com She maintains an active blog at http://www.wisdomthruwords.blogspot.com
and her personal Social Networking Platform http://www.LifeStoryteller.ning.com

11 comments:

D'Rimba said...

Bukan mudah untuk kita mengawal kemarahan ini sering kali diakrabi oleh syaitan.................Mudahan kita dikurniakan kesabaran oleh Allah.

D'Rimba said...

Bolehkah saya mohon izin mdm untuk menyalin gambar Buku Hidup Bukan Rahsia untuk dipromosikan di blog saya?

D'Rimba said...

Sudah iklankan dalam blog saya syoknya...........

Sis Zabrina said...

Bismillaah

As Salaamu 'alaykum and peace to all,

JazakAllaah khayran Amran for your kind thoughts. :)) May Allaah bless you with success in this world and hereafter, ameen....

Salaams
Mdm

D'Rimba said...

Mudahan saya boleh tolong madam banyak lagi apa yang saya mampu, saya bahagia jika dapat membantu madam setulusnya hanya kerana Allah...Keikhlasan madam dalam mengajar dan mendidik dulu amat terkesan dalam hati hanya Allah Maha Mengetahui....Terima kasih madam kerana menjadi seorang pendidik yang ikhlas jiwanya mengajar dan mendidik anak bangsa............

Amin Misran said...

assalamualaykum...

Nice words of inspiration madam...

I have my blog...I'm willing to be a young writer... Need some tips to be a great writer from experts...

http//daemeen.blogspot.com

may the blessings of ALLAH be upon you....

D'Rimba said...

Di tanah air demam liberalisasi makin melanda hinggakan sistem kewangan dan perbankan Islam kena tempiasnya.....masyaAllah selamatkanlah kami anak bangsa ya Allah................

D'Rimba said...

Salam my dear friend.........

Naga said...

About time u start posting aganin.. Im starting to miss all those motivational stories

Syaf said...

Salaams Sis Zabrina and fellow readers,

Ya Allah, when I read this post it feels like you are writing about me and what I went through recently. Unlike the man in your story, I actually said something out of my anger and decided to leave the conversation by walking off.

I was having lunch with a group of people when one person decided to put me in the spotlight and tease me. When I asked her to stop, she would not do so. I asked her again, and she still continued. I was up to a boiling point and decided to just say something sarcastic and walk off.

Perhaps it is not the best decision on my part but I do want to get the message across asking her to stop.

The best part is that she came to apologize to me the next day and promised me she will not do it again.

Again, if I have to go through the situation all over again, perhaps I should react how the man in your story reacted: by just being calm.

People can say nasty things to us, and we can't stop people from talking. But what we can do and change is to respect one another.

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